This weekend, I had a long chat with a friend from high school. L and I haven’t spoken in a while, and had a lot to catch up on. Of course, a big part of that was Boy News. Doesn’t it always come back to that, somehow? Even when there are no boys in your life…no interactions to dissect, no conversations to analyze, no hidden clues in that comment he left on your facebook…even the lack of all that leads to the Boy News update. L is a great friend for this conversation, because she and I so frequently find ourselves on the same page. The things that appall me in men cause the same reaction in her. There are certain traits that inevitably earn approval from both of us.
During our conversation, both of us cited a man as being different from our “usual type.” When she first said it, I suggested that it was a good thing. I recalled some recent examples of her type. Unimpressive, in the long run. (Flaky douchebags. Sorry, L. I’m not saying anything new, though.) When I mentioned the same thing later, she said it was also a positive change for me.
But what IS my type? When I consider it, it’s the model I used in high school. It worked for me at the time. But since then…all my marginally successful encounters have been with guys who did not fit that mold. So what’s up with all this nonsense about my type? My type is clearly not working out for me! (Granted, they’ve all ended up being disappointments somehow, but what else can you expect?) Why am I keeping myself in this tiny box of acceptable men? I mean, clearly they’re all going to have equal potential for obnoxious behavior. They’re all going to baffle me with the decisions they make. I will spend just as much time deciphering the comments from my type as I will for the average male.
I’m ready for a new type.