Sunday, March 29, 2009

Message received.

I don't pay much attention to the text message templates stored in my phone. I've had a new phone for a few months now and decided today to check out what templates the new model offered. "What time are we meeting?" "I'm running late." Pretty standard. "Sorry I missed your call. What's up?" "Where are you?" Yeah, alright. Nothing I'll use. "Talk to you soon." Well, sure I might use that, but I can type it in less time than it takes to find the template. "I love you." "I'm in a meeting." Bori--wait. I love you??

I understand that templates are there for convenience. Generic things that you can send quickly without much thought. Do we really want to promote "I love you" as one of those sentiments? I don't feel good about that. I'm sure that when the decision was made to include that, it wasn't malicious. The Template Team probably envisioned people sending a nice message to their wives in the middle of boring meetings, or a quick text on the way to work to your boyfriend.

It will not remain that way, I fear. Men are going to notice this template, a landmine surrounded by innocuous messages about meetings. They are going to think that it is acceptable to drop the L bomb via TEXT. This will be on their list of Chickenshit Ways to Express Your Feelings, alongside email date invites and letting her know she is your girlfriend by changing your facebook relationship status.

I encourage you to delete this template from your phones, or at least to add, "but not enough to tell you in person or even type it out myself." to the end. (Let's be honest with each other here.)

**PS--My sister's phone, a different model, does not offer the I love you template. It DOES, however, offer "I love you too." Coincidence? Or meant to be? You decide.

Sunday, March 01, 2009


Dear Rihanna,
Are you kidding me? Please tell me that all these news reports are false and you're not back together with Chris Brown. We all saw the picture and heard the stories when he "allegedly" beat you. (That's the tricky thing with the word allegedly. It leaves room for "no, he didn't, I fell down some stairs." But most of us still think he did, and will continue to think so. Sorry, but that's the truth.) And now you're BACK with him?? Are you an idiot? Do you even realize that as a public figure, you're a role model? And young girls look up to you? You could do so many positive things with that! But this, THIS is what you show them?
I hope you figure things out.
Solitarily yours,
Bitter Amanda