Tuesday, August 11, 2009

It's just science.


Let's talk about this video for a second, ok? It's the newest thing to be passed around among my friends. It has appeared in my inbox several times, so clearly I need to discuss it publicly.

It is ridiculous. I cannot believe that this exists. I can only imagine the road that led to this commercial showing up in my email. Some guy (CLEARLY this came from a male mind) was bummed about not getting enough action from his lady. "Hmm," he thought to himself, "how can I convince her of this?....."
And then a little cartoon lightbulb appeared over his head, illuminating his pathetic idea. "I will incorporate science! I will appeal to her feminine vanity and poke at her already fragile self-esteem, weak from years of beauty magazines and Victoria's Secret models!"
Feeling deprived, he threw himself into research, trying to tackle this issue. Using the idea that "scientists say THIS PARTICULAR MOTION WHICH DOES NOT AT ALL RESEMBLE SOMETHING A WOMAN MIGHT DO TO PLEASE A MAN is good for you! Builds muscle! It's better than going to the gym!" he sold the idea. He put on his suit and presented it to a room full of more suits and convinced them of its merit. And then it was manufactured and put on television.
It's almost poetic, if you frame it with The American Dream. We live in a place where a man** can invent this ridiculous product and suddenly it's being sold on the internet. Pathetic, of course, but a little poetic at the same time.

**purely speculation on the part of Bitter Amanda, of course

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