Friday, September 06, 2013

Purging My Facebook

I have a hard time deleting people from my life.

I have no problem cutting things off with a guy (which should not surprise you after all we've been through), giving the cold shoulder to someone's ex, or ignoring people in public when I don't care about how many times your baby pooped today. But when it comes to getting rid of their digital presence in my life, it's harder. 

I can tell you my reasons, of course. I keep phone numbers in my phone for a long time because I want to know who is calling--an ex pocket dialed me the other day, which I figured out when he hung up after two rings. (Unless he really does want me back and is just nervous...hmm...) If I had deleted his number, I would have considered calling him back after seeing my area code. Awkwardness avoided! 

I keep some exes (mine, Twin's, that sort of thing...) around on facebook so I can creep on them and feel superior. I can tell someone her ex has gained a lot of weight or is dating someone far less pretty. I keep these cards in my pocket for moments of low self-esteem or boredom. (I know, that's rude. Whatever.)

I think all the rest of my excuses are pretty lame, though--because basically I just want the option of seeing what you're doing with your life. Maybe I want to make fun of your ugly bridesmaids dresses or call a real friend and marvel that you're pregnant again. (OK, I'M A TERRIBLE PERSON, I GET IT.)

But you guys...I must be going through some maturity growth spurt or something because I just cleaned up my facebook a little. I was checking the privacy settings on a status update I was about to make, when I realized how dumb it is that I have people on my "friend" list who pretty much don't see anything of mine, ever. WHICH IS REALLY DUMB and also they are not people I would call friends, to their face or anyone else's. 

So I clicked on that unfriend button. Someone's asshole ex? Gone. Woman I HATED in college? Bye. JYA bitch? You're out. Annoying girl I worked with a million years ago? Unfriend. 

It felt awesome. Why was I keeping those people in my life? Growing up is easy


We won't talk about how after that I shamelessly facebook stalked not only a guy from my past but also a guy I met recently. Not at all. We're going to focus on the first part of this blog. PERSONAL GROWTH.

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