First of all, let me just clear something up. My mother likes to watch ballroom dancing, and I adore both PBS and my mother. So when there was a celebrity-free competition on PBS and my mother asked me to leave it, I did.
We watched a few couples and it was alright. Some nice music, various Russian women wearing odd dresses. And then. Ohhhh, then. A couple came on the dance floor dressed like robots. The announcer said of them, "They certainly are transformers!" Please tell me this is a joke. Any second she'll rip off her unflattering metallic black and silver outfit and reveal the usual ballroom dress. Right?
Wrong. So very, very wrong. This couple actually got out there and danced ballroom dancing like goddamn robots! It was as if they were talking one day and he said, "You know what I hate? When judges tell you that your dancing is mechanical." And her eyes lit up and she had a brilliant plan! "Nooooo...we can work with that! You know how robots are like, the least sexy thing since gangrene? NOT ANYMORE, MY FRIEND!"
And you know the worst part? THEY WON FIRST PRIZE AND GOT A STANDING OVATION.
I'm not ashamed to tell you that I did, in fact, do The Robot around the living room while telling my mother I was destined for ballroom stardom. (She disagrees. She'll be sorry!)